A mentor once said, “Focus on this. One life, one person at a time. If you can create an impact, a change like that, that’s all that matters”.  #sundaewrites

 

 

Bored.

Burdened.

If you have felt these lately, you are not alone. A  million of us share the same road.

In my small circle of friends, at least half of us feel like life is a drag- a heavy load you need to carry with you wherever you want to go. Each step lands your foot in a mud.  You’ve got to pull your leg a little harder every time so you get to move.  If at all, you get to move.

Why do we have days like these? Why can’t we always feel happy and stay like that all year long?

While we all know that happiness is a decision you make for yourself, it’s easier said than done, or perhaps we don’t really know what that means or what it really takes.

All the successful people you’ve known were once upon a time nobodies. They started small. They struggled but kept on because they were driven by something that’s far greater than themselves. Something noble and beautiful. Something they desire to create not only for themselves but for the world, even if that world only meant a handful of people that they deeply care about. So in time, they’ve overcome the hurdles and eventually became great- famous, wealthy, powerful.

Then it happens. Success made these same people get so engrossed on fame, wealth, and power. The drive is now to maintain the status quo or exceed the same. So, they get to work to produce more success-  toil day in and day out that it becomes an obligation they believe they owe to themselves.

Is that bad? Not necessarily. But weak motivations won’t hold you up forever.  You see, the moment our focus change, we forget about why we do what we do in the first place. Our great WHY vanishes into thin air.

 

photo credits: Jon Tyson
photo credit: Jon Tyson

 

Take for example this writing.  I don’t know how many people will get to read this and how many of those who read it actually cares.  Despite the nagging desire to know, I choose to resist it. One of my mentors actually said, even the greatest writers still have that fear of rejection- you just have to deal with it. Then she spilled out this nugget of wisdom that up to now continues to motivate me. “Focus on this. One life, one person at a time. If you can create an impact, a change like that, that’s all that matters”.  So whenever I scribble something on a notepad or strike letters on my keyboard, I think about that one person that might find these words useful. Then the writing stops being an obligation. It now becomes an opportunity. No longer a drag rather, a source of delight.

Whenever you feel battered in life, one of the ways that can heal you is through your ability to receive love. Most “strong” people forget about that. Does it come from ego or pride? Maybe.

Regardless, you need to break that wall and let love seep through. You’ll always be a child. Even strong muscles or gray hairs cannot change that.  You need love. Don’t be too proud to receive it.

Boredom. Burden. These are real, but you deserve better.

Embrace your great WHY and open up your heart for Love.

 

photo credit: ben white
photo credit: ben white

 

Question:

Have you taken a step back at one point in life to just reevaluate things? To remind yourself again why you do what you do? What did this “pause” reveal about yourself and the life you pursue? I care about your thoughts. Share them here.

 

There’s no need for love to be profound.  It is what it is even in the mundane of things.

 

Words are cheap. It’s easy to say I love yous’ and not really stand by every word you express. It’s easy to feel love for other people especially when they’re miles away and you don’t need to put up with their daily dramas and annoyances. So I believe, we love best when we do so even if,

it’s uncomfortable,

even when it’s hard,

even when it takes up your time, your energy and your resources.

So, are we really ready for this? Do we have the strength of will to carry on?

Love is a verb.  It’s a call to action. The most beautiful of roses have thorns. So it is with love- the sweetest of it requires the greatest sacrifice.  A call for a noble deed or dying for a friend may be uncommon these days, but that call exists even in the simplest of circumstances:

-to lose sleep for a loved one who needs to talk his heart out through the night

-to save a sandwich for a coworker who missed lunch because of deadlines

-to trash your well-laid plans for the day and drop by to check on a friend

-to laugh at your dad’s joke no matter how silly it is ‘coz you’re happy that he is

-to remember someone’s need in prayer, even if you have much of your own

-to put up with a kids tantrum, knowing he’s just scared and maybe needs attention as grown-ups still do

There are a lot of different ways to act on love, but often times we neglect these opportunities because we’re so focused on ourselves and our needs. So we end up loving in our own terms. Conditional. But maybe if we give it a little more effort, and speak the kind of language the other person has, we can brighten someone else’s day and there’ll be one less lonely or sad person in the world. One person at a time. One effort at a time. That wouldn’t be so overwhelming.

If a person feels loved when somebody listens to his stories- lend an ear. If a person feels loved when she gets an encouragement- say something. If a person feels loved by receiving some help- extend a hand. There’s no need for love to be profound.  It is what it is even in the mundane of things.

And for us who expects love in a big way- like a strong wind that sweeps us off our feet, my challenge is this:  Wake up, and see love in the ordinary.  A kind smile. A sunny day, even a rainy one. A warm home-cooked meal. A hand to hold. A glimpse of nature. A gentle word.

Love is everywhere and it is in you too.  Don’t just show up to receive it. Show up to give it. Your own little way makes it special, makes it count.  A friend, a husband,  wife, a father, a son, a mom a daughter, a colleague, a stranger, we are no different from one another.  Everybody needs love. And everybody is capable of giving it. Be it simple or grand- act on it, and on the flipside, learn to recognize it too.

 

Photo Credits: Kristina Litvjak

 

What keeps you going every single day? You know, that thing that fires you up, tickles your toes, and pokes your heels to leap, or even run with a penguin-like pair of happy feet?  That one good thing that gives you a merry heart?

Dreams. They give me wings.  They make my heart flutter, and wildly take my imagination to a place, full of vivid colors and exciting possibilities.  It scares me sometimes, the great unknown. But it pays to set your sights on to what could possibly be good, rather than what could go wrong.

If you wake up to mornings dragging yourself to the shower with arc-shaped lips and folded eyebrows like you’re about to drop onto the floor and cry – – friend, you’re in danger zone and you’ve got to pull yourself out of it!

“Why me?”, you asked.  Well, of course. Because you are your own best friend. Let me break it to you. The people around you, they can only do so much. You have to accept that.  If you don’t see yourself worthy of a meaningful existence, a higher calling, or up for a bigger purpose, then right there, you’ve already lost the battle. Why? Because the last person who could ever have that faith in you has just given up. And that’s you. You have lost your faith, in you.

People will find it hard to fight for someone who won’t even fight for themselves. Even if they do, they can only get very far. If you’re that someone, please don’t neglect your own self. You’re too precious for that. The sooner you’ll realize this truth the sooner you’ll get out of the hollow you’re in.

We often forget that the life we have is not some sort of entitlement.  Rather, it’s a gift, an opportunity. No wonder we take it for granted many times. We complain a lot, we get frustrated and sad for too long that it shortens our breath and aches our bodies.  Oftentimes, we get too focused on our own hurts and forget about the rest of the world who’s hurting too.  We don’t look far and wide enough.  Our “own world” is too small just like a hole that we dig into. So what happens? We let our brilliance slip from memory.  We lose the spark.  We become immobile, useless according to our own terms.

Friend, can you come back to the land of the living?  We need you here. The years you’ve lived with all the battles you’ve fought hard and may have lost- is not everything. That is not all there is to it. You became more because of those struggles. And there is more to life, more good things yet to come. And you’ve got to focus on these.  You and I already know that we have a limited time. So let’s fill what we have with memories we can be proud of, and leave a legacy that we have lived our lives to the full and lived it well- well enough to touch others.

When you add life to life, it just gets better. When you add life to where there’s a lack of it, then you’re standing on higher ground.  With your scars and all, you can still help people.  If you’re that someone who needs help, receive it.  There may be times when you’d feel the need to ask for it, go ahead because that’s okay.  But remember, while you ask others for help, help yourself too.  Start with you.